nothing of interest

nothing much happened today. watching mould grow on me is probably my highlight of the day. i'm still tired after 13 hours of sleep. finally, my energy is depleted. anyways, to bed i go. nitey nite.

24 hour ordeal

yesterday was mid-autumn festival. what was supposed to be a picnic by the river side and have moon cake as dessert while admiring the moon turned out to be dinner down at Lygon Street and spent the night in CYK's room doing nothing much other than starting my own family.... in The Sims 2 and raged WW3 through out the night and into the day. i didnt get much sleep... well, only had a few 10 minutes nap here and there. the girls were supposed to call us after they were done with singing k but they didnt. reason why i didnt wana go was because i dont sing. CYK didnt go either cuz he was low on cash. RC also didnt go cuz she was suffering from a major headache. so the 3 of us headed back to the hostel after dinner while waiting patiently for them to call in which they didnt. they said that they wanted to see the sun rise over the ocean but that failed too as most of them were already, according to RC, certified dead. it wasnt until we called them at 5 in the morning did they realize they failed to call us and left us waiting. so then we decided to meet up for breakfast at 8am. so then... what did we do in between 5am to 8am? the usual in between running a family and raging on with WW3 in which CYK started.... i think. so then its breakfast over in Hungry Jacks or Burger King as known in Malaysia... or wherever else. after that, its once again back to the hostel because the few of us that remained standing after last night's ordeal wanted to go look see look see over in Chapel Street. yes, being the strong ones, we persisted with the plan. we did indeed go all the way to Chapel Street, walked to whooooooooole stretch of road in which i managed to get lost in and in which got CYK pissed... ok ok, lets not venture into this... so then we walked the whoooooooooooole stretch of the road and i must say, CYK looks like a living corpse by the time we were walking back to the train station. that poor guy.... and he was sleeping almost the whole way back into the city. you'd think that our journey ends here. but no. wait a minute! i forgot that winnie took CYK's mobile and has failed to give it back to him yesterday. so i had to go all the waaaaaaay down to College House or something that ends with the word House which was a well 20 minutes journey because i didnt know where it was and ended up stopping at the wrong stop and had to look for the place. thank goodness leslie was with me... ok ok... so what if i've been in melb for 7 or 8 months and can still manage to get myself lost? sue me!! after getting the mobile, its a looooooong way back to the hostel but before that, we stopped for dinner. after dinner, you'd think that my journey ends, eh? nah-uh... for someone who hasnt slept in the last 24 hours, this is the last thing that you'd be expecting from me - running around in every direction when i myself am at the brink of collapsing. so then i got myself a nice long hot shower and right after, winnie said to meet me for dinner in China Town and obviously i said yes cuz tonight will be the last night that she would be in Melb and i wanted to see her that last time before she left for Tassy. 2 dinners in the last 3 hours. am i great or what? thank goodness i made it back in one piece. you have no idea how many times i felt like collapsing right then and there. i'm soooo tired.... so tired that i'm feeling energetic. this sounds weird, ay? but not one bit. guess i'm just running on pure adrenaline. now that my business for the day has been completed, i can finally get my rest. i do hope i can manage to sleep. the last time i was this tired, i couldnt sleep for 2 nights...oh oh oh... and i'm proud to announce that i might be the only one still standing after so many hours of not sleeping. the rest are all, as RC says it, certified.

in any case,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WONG CHEE WEI!!!!!

if you guys no know who he is, he's my big bro.

all fine and dandy

aaaaaw... that was so shweeet! man, you can cry~ seeing you almost cry made me cry. anyways, i'm sorry too. *huggiez*

what a day.... indeed

what was supposed to be a very happy day out shopping turned sour, real fast. i guess its partially my fault though. i didnt listen when he was explaining. i mean... i would love to hear his reason but i guess my anger got the better of me. those who knows me well should know that when i get angry, i DO NOT listen. well... i may listen if you insist enough. ok then... there goes our chance of making up. but wait a minute! its not the 1st day that you know me, ok? i have nothing when it comes to directions so sue me! but since you were walking down the street anyways, what the hell were you snapping at me for? did i some how managed to ruin your shopping over in HYPE? if i did, then i'm very well sorry. you didnt have to snap at me. you do not snap at your friends. just because you think that its wrong to get lost on the bloody street you decided to snap at me. this is not how you treat your friends ok? i dont appreciate it. what would you do if i snapped at you the way you snapped at me?? whatever man... not like you would understand.

its the amnesia, i tell you!

you'd think that when people ask about you, the 1st thing they'll ask is how you're doing and all that but nope. not in my tuition teacher's case (used to be my tuition teacher). TT: hey, MY where is beckie? *before she could even say anything* TT: she still owes me my calculator!!!! ok, so its my bad for accidentally taking his calculator aaaaaaaaaaall the way to Aussie land. its not my fault! really!! just had some erm... temporary amnesia that made me forget that i took his calculator. when i was unpacking my things i noticed this thing bulging from my pencil case... hm... what is that? its his calculator!!!! i am gonna be so meat when i get back.

surprise, surprise

was about to enjoy my cup of morning coffee when i got an unexpected call. guess who? winnie is back in town! i got her over to the hostel and we were just talking and talking and talking and talking... from 1030 in the morning to 0345 in the evening and non stop at that. just love her company. anyways, she's gonna go for her visa interview to the US tomorrow. hope all goes well for her! nikki, you no look too happy. something the matter, dear? anyways, i hope you're fine. i'll always lend an ear if you need one, k?

2 more months and counting

2 more months before i fly back. miss home so much. the closer it is to going back, the more anxious and restless i get. 2 more months in this hell hole before i'm set free!!! there's so many things waiting for me to do when i get back. we're even planning to go over to Gunung Emas or some other gunung to live in the tree houses. hm... maybe i should borrow CYK's lonely planet guide and read about sabah, ay?

you may officially call me MAYOR!

finally, after much observation i am now earning money for my city. earning MONEAY!!!! well, i'm not earning much though. just about 100 simoleons or so but at least now i'm earning MONEAY. ah... the smell of success. nothing can be better. in any case, i got a look at CYK's elbow during dinner. it looks horrible!!! its like he got infected with elephantiasis (me no know how to spell >.<) but only on his elbow and he's got this huge ass blister on his elephantiasis infected elbow that's oozing fluid. yuck yuck!! and speaking of yuckiness, i just discovered that i've got prolly a dozen or so blisters (boils according to CYK...but dun boils have puss in em?! in any case, i'm refering to those water bubble thingie that grows on the inner side of the lips) lining my inner lip. no wonder its been feeling weird all day! sheeet!!! too much tia maria i guess?? ah well, the aftermath of having fun.

i am alive!!!!!

yeash people! i am back!! not that i've been away. anyways, i've lived through last night's ordeal. ah... feels so good to not have my gastric juice pooling up in my stomach and eating my stomach away. poor ol' CYK has gotten a really bad case of...allergy? hope he gets better.

oh yeah....

what a wonderful yet painful night. had tia maria... lots of it!! heavenly... but the down side? my gastritis is playing with me. i guess i'll just have to live through it. do i have a choice?!!!! agh!! i want my daddy!!! it hurts soooooooOOOOOOOOOoooooooo bad!!!!!!!!!!

i sure as hell make one heck of a mayor.

i make a very bad mayor! no matter how hard i try, i just can not seem to earn money for my city. ah... yes, people. i'm playing sim city 4 and from this, i've learned that strategy game is not my kinda thing. the word does not exist in my dictionary. i just cant make the city run properly! the more i expand, the more i stuff i need to build, the more debt i go into. earning from my taxes just aint enough! agh.... in any case, i'll try again tomorrow and see how things work out. sitting in front of my lappie for hours in a row has taken its toll on me so to bed i go! oh oh oh... and its steamboat for dinner tomorrow!!! yeash!!!! food food foOOOOooOOOOood!!!!!!!

the queen of kiasuness has give up...for today

you know what? i dont care whether i win this stupid hit the bloody penguin game anymore!! the queen of kiasuness has given up. well, for today that is. my eyes are just too tired and the game is getting boring and its wasting away my brain cells playing these kinda games. until another day! i shall not loose to CYK for long. you just wait! oh... yeah... and so the winner is CYK. apparently, after laughing at how he couldn't beat me, he beat me!!! ah... screw that guy! me no care anymore!!! i will get back at him in another way. no worries. *yawn* me so sleepy.

hit the penguin

ok, so there i was, bored out of my mind until CYK introduced this really cute game. what it does? hit the penguin and let it fly... up up and away and see where it lands!!! we were having this little competition... who gets to hit the penguin furthest wins. he presented me with a 500-ish score in which i beat him with a score of 588. after trying LONG and HARD, he managed to get a draw. but then... well, i decided that i will not have a draw. its either i win...wait... i have to win! so back to the hard work! after a few minutes... viola!!! i beat him with a score of *drum roll* 593!!!!! try as hard as you want but you WILL NOT beat me!!! mwahahha!!!! i win i win i win i win i win i win!!!!! and the proof of it... see? see? 593... ah... I WIN!!!!! sweet sweet victory!! oh.. i nearly forgot!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAYMOND YONG ZHIEN WE!!!!!!!!

you've finally moved on, ay? i'm happy for you. i hope the both of you can make it through! gambatehne!!!

exams are over

yes!!! i'm FREE!!! chem was soooo easy!!! even CYK was confident that he'd pass the exam. just came back from Myers and i'm sooooo tired. now i'll just need to think about what to do for the next 11 days. after the holidays, it'll be about 5 weeks before i go home! i can not wait! while walking back from myers, i noticed how almost everyone seems to be in a relationship. sigh... its starting to bother me. guess i've been away from a man for too long. the feeling of being held, being cared for, being loved... i miss those. well, i'll just have to be patient!. patience is a virtue.... patience is a virtue....

i need to chill

i need to chill, i need to chill, i need to chill, i need to chill!!!! i am getting all worked up again. weeeeeell, my bad for not studying at all last night and now i'm worried that i might forget how to do the calculations and state which theory is what. i am soooo nervous! this is not good. this is not good. i need to chill!!! c'mon bec! you can do it! yes, yes, i can do it. ah... this is getting stupid.

2 down and 1 to go!!!

yeash, people!!! its 2 down and 1 to go!! mwahaha!!!! which reminds me, i still havent told my parents that i dropped physics!!! i am in deeeeeeeeeep trouble. they'll probably nag the living life outta me... oh well, one more exam to go and i'm FREE!!! my bio paper was great! easy. sooooo easy! pst, i hope my answers are correct! and its chem tomorrow! another easy paper, or so i hope. i'm wondering if i should bother studying tonight. i'm tired... and more importantly lazy. a case of being very very over confident, no? oh well....

nervousness

exam starts at 1.20pm and i'm really nervous. beats me why i'm so worked up over this paper. havent felt this way since... junior 3! i wasnt even a tad worried when i sat for my SPM and UEC papers. i mean c'mon! its only biology! i can ace this paper even with my eyes closed... so why am i nervous?

fly alert!!!

THERE IS A FLY IN MY ROOM!!!!!!! there i was enjoying my time staring at my lappie and what do i hear? a buzzing noise so loud it'll make me go deaf. no, its not your typical teeny weeny house fly. its HUGE!!!! agh!!! its fat, its huge, its LOUD, its fast!!!! absolutely scary!!! eeeeek!!! i HATE anything with more than 4 legs!!! ew!!! its giving me a heart attack!!!! i hate FLIES!!!!!! T_T i wana go home!!!! *wails* i hate spring! no, i dont hate spring. i hate the hugeass flies that comes flying around in spring. T_T i want my daddy!!!! T_T *wails even more* sheeeeeet!!! i hear another one outside the window!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!! FLIES!!!!!

math... sigh...

today has got to be one of the worst day since i got here. sigh... i couldnt do my math! well, its not that the questions are hard. its pretty simple and i'm sure i can do pretty much all of the questions... if only... if only i could remember what was what. damnit! i was so sure that i could at least get a 70% but now... i'd be happy if i pass at all. sigh... this is so disappointing. i guess i was over confident. i hope i pass!!!! *cross fingers and toes* tomorrow is biology. i WILL and MUST do well. i WILL get the highest score in class. i WILL NOT let those hongkie girls beat me in my best subject. well, one of my best subject for that matter. failing math is bad enough. i dont wana do badly in my bio. wish me luck!!!

oh, dear me

woke up in the wee hours of the morning to call my baby. had a 4 hour talk! absolutely lovely... if only we could talk longer. for the millionth time, i miss him so, so much! only about 2 more months before i get to see him!!! mmm... i can already smell him... the soapy smell that i like.... *goes off into lala land* on a more serious note. tomorrow is dooms day! exam starts!!! eeeek!!! i'm really doing a good job doing everything else but study. haih... my math is meat!!! daymit!!!! no more skipping gen math class! this is what happens to bad girls that constantly skips class. somebody spank me. ritey then. i'ma hit the books and hope that i get something done.

frustration

agh! i am so frustrated!!!! i cant get anything right! =( *bangs head on the wall* i want my daddy!!

ramble ramble ramble

i am in deep sheeeeeet. i am going to gain so much weight after the exams!!! i'm doing a good job eating and eating and eating... i think my double chin is starting to show. sheeeeet!!! lets just hope that i'm imagining things. mwahaha... finally threaten my baby enough for him to leave me a comment! sigh... i miss him so much. i still have exactly 70 days to go before i get to fly home and see him. cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait!!!!! mommy called the other day. she wants me to buy hair dye for her. she says that those made in OZ are better! =-=" i would like to think that its the same. its gona cost me a fortune to get her stuff. sigh... exam starts on monday and what have i been doing these past few days? doing everything but study!! somebody spank me! i'm such a bad girl! in any case, i'd better hit the books. still have so much to study!!!

i declare myself bonkers

AGH!!! i miss my baby so much its killing me!!! 2 and a half months... its taking forever for 2 and a half months to end!!! i wana go back and see my baby!!! not one second that goes by that i dont think about him!!!! sigh... i just miss him so much!!! we've never been seperated for this long before... AGH!!! i wana go home!!!! i'm going bonkers!!! i want to rip someone's eyes out!!! i think i'm gona go to bed now. prevents me from thinking so much. sigh... there goes my attempt to study.

bitchy ol' me

this is the time of the year where i am bitchy, mean, rude and offensive. i am stressed beyond stressed. add stress onto PMS and viola! you have a true authentic bitch. as for you people out there who thinks that my YOU! post is scary... live with it! like what nikki sez, inner bitch unleashing itself. i say what i want to say and say when i want to so sue me. see if i care. this is my blog. you have a problem? then leave. i be who i want to be. this is the side of myself that i don't show people. i may be bright and sunny and have flowers sprouting from my ears and nose all the time but there are times where i just want to be mean. so leave me be. tomorrow will be a better day. i promise, after all the exams and what not are over, i'll be back to my old self. so bear with me. note: no offense to anyone out there who is reading my blog.

YOU!

my life, my thoughts are none of your business. these things are mine alone. you have no need of telling me what you think is right or wrong because i do not give a flying rats ass about what you think. i know myself best. so keep your bright ideas to your own self and run your life as it suits you. go get a life and stay out of mine.

accomplishments

things that i have accomplished tonight:

• finish a whole container of chocolate cookies
• gain prolly 10kg from eating so much
• grow a tummy
• get tooth decay
• develop diabetes
• finished up electrolysis and galvanic cells
• lost my temper countless times and attempted to rip the bloody books apart
• studied for 5 hours in a row

oh yeah. huge accomplishments... thank goodness that class only starts at 1030 tomorrow!!

i am PMSing

i am suffering from full blown PMS!!! sigh... my mood is playing tricks on me, my appetite insatiable, i'm really tired and i'm having really really bad tummy cramps. i am about to finish the whole container of chocolate ripple cookies that i juz bought yesterday. T_T i am gona gain so much weight after my period. haih... bad bad. so bad. ugh, need to get back to studying.... and eating my choc cookies. >.<

i need something to help me get focused

i cant concentrate!!! my mind is all over the place. i cant get it to focus!!! agh!!!! this is so bloody frustrating!!! sigh. only 5 more days to the bloody exams and i cant concentrate! i'm at the brink of crying. i want my daddy!!! the thing is. i really dont know what to stuy for biology. is there even anything to study for?!!! is it just me or did we even get notes for mutation and protein synthesis?!! oh dear me. maybe i'll just pass trying to study tonight. >.<

$$$$$

money or happiness? which do you think is most important? call me naive, but i think happiness is more important than money. wise old chinese men say that you can do jackshit without money. true... but i'd still prefer happiness over money. you can be rich yet unhappy and you can be poor but happy. not that i'd want to be poor and happy. i would want to have money, enough for me to live comfortably and be happy. i really dont care about being loaded. once in a while, i bring up the topic of my family's financial status while talking to hubby. he gets all upset saying that if he only knew i was loaded when he knew me... all the if's and what not. sigh... makes me think that he regrets having this relationship with me. i admit, i am well off where as he, his family struggles very hard to make ends meet. but do i care? no! if i'd really care about how loaded he is, i wouldnt have gotten together with him, would i? so what if my family is well off? its my parents' money. not mine. they've strived very hard to get where they are today, not me. i do not take inherited property as my own. i would like to work for my own things, for my own success, not by depending on other people to get it. sigh... i guess hubby is just worried that my family would object to our relationship. well, my family was once poor, without anything. my parents' dedication and hard work has landed us where we are today. we know the feeling of being poor because we once were. so who are my parents to object him because he's not so well off? i love my hubby for who he is inside. i dont care about his looks nor his riches. its the real him that i love. money or no, i want him. my baby, if you're reading this... i really want you to know that i dont care. its you that i'm interested in. YOU!

perfect.... just perfect

brother said that he's interested in smart home technology. if you ask me, that is just plain silly... the idea that things would work out. its just plain silly. for starters, he doesn't know the business. he doesnt know what he's getting into. he thinks that it's easy to assemble the systems. he doesn't know that these smart home techy thing comprises of many systems put together. he doesnt know that smart home techy doesnt come all nicely packaged with all the systems together. he doesnt know that to install these high tech smart home tech stuff, you need an experienced engineer. he doesnt know jack shit about anything and yet he wants to venture into this so called business. and he doesnt know that you need truck loads of money to start off this business. to him, everything is easy. when i told him my baby went for training concerning one of the smart home system, he was surprised. he says that you didnt need prior training to know how to do this. its all in a package. oh! how stoooopid is that?! and he sure as hell didnt know that all these smart home techy thing needs to be programmed to suit individual needs. oh...!!!!!!!!! he can dream all he wants but all i can say is, this is not going to work out. whether or not he wants to accept the reality, its just not going to work out! he's dreaming. he's off into his lala land where everything is nice, sweet and perfect. i hope he's got his seat belts and armor on. he is going to fall hard.

i want ma sleep

here i am, awake at 7 in the morning hoping to get some math done. last night's attempt in doing math was a huge disaster. all my answers turned out to be wrong and i can't figure out where i went wrong! daymit! so, after ma cuppa coffee, i'm gona get back to where i left off and hope that i figure out what my mistakes are. my usual 11 hours sleep has been cut down to 7 hours... i hope i can live through this.

scaaaaaaaaary part 2

EEEEEEEEK!!!!! ma roomie scared the !@#@#$ hell outta mua!!!! if you people still dont know who ma roomie is, shame on you people!!! she's the one... and only, nikki kah!!! so anyways, there i was drying my hair.... and suddenly i hear noises behind me. curiosity got the better of me and i turned around to check only to find her standing almost behind mua!!!!! T_T

oh dear me

what was supposed to be a nap turned out to be a full blown 2 1/2 hours sleep. daaaaaaaym!!!! gotta start my sacrificial ceremonies to the deities soon in hope that i can get everything covered before the exams which is in 7 days and counting. sheeeeeet!

decision

hubby presented me with a question concerning my post the previous day. he asked me if i still wanted him to look out for me. looking out for me meant that there would be no excessive drinking, no drinking when he's not around, no fagging, no fooling around and whatever not. if i said no, he would leave me alone, meaning that i can finally enjoy life as a 19 year old and not care about anything else other than have fun. if i said yes, then i'd be saying goodbye to my freedom, freedom to do things that i so choose. but to my surprise, my answer was yes and i meant it from the bottom of my heart. saying this, i realize that i do not have the freedom to do a lot of things... i guess its ok. as long as he's still there, caring for me, looking out for me, loving me. i guess its a little price that i have to pay for being with him. but its ok...

mommy and daddy and brother

mommy dearest called. apparently, they had another fight. well, it wasn't supposed to turn out that way. brother and daddy dearest had a fight the other day. so then, mommy dearest wanted to make brother happy and told him that daddy dearest already got the benz. so then brother told mommy that he wanted the wira sent over to ceras so that he can drive to school instead of walking. but then mommy dearest didnt want to cuz the maintenance costs and petrol would cost a fortune. then brother lost his temper at mommy dearest for not wanting to send the car over to him. mommy dearest said that he's a man. walking 20 minutes shouldn't be a problem. then brother told her how he needed to go to school all the time to do his project and since he'll be starting a company soon, he would need to car to scout around for a good location or something like that. and hearing that he's thinking of opening a company, mommy dearest got all upset again. for those of you who knows my brother, you'll know that he has a lot of 'BIG' plans lined up and i guess this is one of them. to put it bluntly, he's building castles in the air. its not that i'm looking down on him, its that i know him too well. he's always talking about big projects, big businesses, big whatever else. its pretty scary. oh, back to the main topic. so then mommy dearest told him that she'd already sold the wira to a friend and this really really really got brother worked up. the point of all this? mommy dearest will not send the car over to him and brother is mighty pissed off at the moment. oh, and one thing that is really really bothering me is the way he's spending money over in west m'sia. he's using over RM1000 a month! now that is way too much to be spending in malaysia. even i dont spend as much here over in australia and i'm pretty much sure that my parents don't even spend so much on themselves. sigh... he's 21 now. he should know how to spend money wisely. money doesnt grow on trees and its not easy to earn either. the money that he's spending is hard earned money. i really hope that he comes to his senses soon enough and stop spending so extravagantly. its not like we're filthy rich. sigh... i'm really worried about daddy. he's got high blood pressure and the last thing he needs is another fight with brother. i know how stressed daddy can get after a fight with him. sigh... and i dont think my family back home is holding up so well. mom has called me 3 or 4 times this week. no... not a good sign. i'm not saying that its bad that she's calling me. its just that its not like my mom to call me out of the blues. even the times i call home, mom is usually too shy to talk to me, let alone call me. that's my mom. if there's nothing important, she wont utter a word to me. not that we're not close as a matter of fact, we share a very strong bond. but that's the way she works. i guess mommy dearest is really really stressed out. after all, a lot has happened in the past few weeks. sigh... i really want to go home to mommy and daddy. i really do hope their holding up. i guess its pretty tough to have both children away from home. the loneliness, the emptiness they must feel... and i'm sure that they'll have a harder time with coping with business as well. i was there to help them when i was back at home... but now, i'm here, 10 hours flight away from home... sigh... i really really hope that they can cope without me around to help. daddy was always joking, telling me not to go to australia and that i should just take over the business. sigh... all i can do is just hope for the best and pray that they'll be able to hold up. they're not getting any younger. even before i left, mommy and daddy dearest were always complaining about how tired they are and how they easily tire even with the simplest tasks... *sighs even more*

lessons

spent yesterday in CYK's room doing math (yeash, i'm a good girl arent i? do i desserve some ice cweam??? *pats self on the head*), drink the night away, played scrabble in the weeeeeeeeee hours of the morning, watched cantonese serial, played a bit of serious sam and just chilling out. like the old saying goes, its the journey that is most important, not the outcome. and yes, i have learned something from last night's chilling out session.

• my brain still works after 10pm. i'm pretty sure it goes into hybernate mode at 9.30pm
• i am pretty good in math or rather i'm not as bad as i thought.
• i was prettier 2 years ago than i am now.
• i CAN finish a crossword puzzle weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell, with CYK's help anyways.
• i am not a walking, talking, breathing dictionary. FAAAAAAAAAR from it!
• and i have learned that WAH actually means The Panda. yeash people!!! the panda. as in the panda with black spots around the eyes, the panda with nice soft cuddly fur and is a subspecies of a bear. to this second, i still can not believe it.

in any case, hubby called last night. i told him i went drinking in CYK's room and he got pissed off at me. as any human being, i got rather upset but i held it in. i didnt want to get into a fight with him. he then proceeded to lecture me and what not. =( sigh... sometimes i wonder if i've made the right choice. being with someone very much older than you is pretty much difficult. he's a bit too over protective and its suffocating at times. sigh... i guess its for my own good. after all, who doesnt want what's best for their loved ones? we've come this far, gone through a lot more things than normal couples would have... *yawn* back to bed i go. sooooo tired...zzzZZZZzzzzZZzzz....

not a very good day

my neighbour is very noisy! if its one thing i CANOT stand, its noisy neighbours! why cant they talk in the room like normal people?! they just HAVE to stay out in the corridor, scream their lungs out, tell stupid stories like how they lied to their parents and what shit. so bloody annoying!!! they sit in the corridor like it belongs to them. agh... fuckers!!! if it carries on past 11pm i am going to make sure those idiots get another warning letter!!!! just found out that my hubby nearly got himself killed the other day while driving up to keningau! he was driving a bit too fast for my comfort. thank goodness for the piece of grassland next to the road that saved his life. when i get back, i'll make sure i give him a bloody long lecture!!!! thank goodness nothing happened!!! agh.... mommy called again. lets just hope that my aunt would be able to help us out. and lets hope that after 3 years, all goes as planned. sigh... lets hope... lets hope. would hate it if anything happens within the time that i'm in oz. lets just hope that i'll be able to complete my education as well. sigh...

study? yes? no?

can i put off my studies for another day? huh? huh? huh?!!!!!!!!! biaaaaatch. about 11 more days to the exam and i still havent touched anything. my notes are doing a good job collecting dust in the corner. can not be so lazy!!! bad beckie!!! naughty beckie!!! dinner tonight was... horrible!!! mr nice asian chef's cooking isnt all that great anymore. and i don't think he washes the veggies when he cooks 'em. there i was enjoying my peas and corns and i just had to bite into the 'bak choi' and.... and.... oh...i just cant continue... its so traumatizing!!!it... it was... it was filled with sand!!!! yuck!!! filled with thick, disgustingly brown, bacterial infested sand!!!!!! ew!!! i hope me no get tummy ache... eeee!!!! gross!!! hm... wonder how's everyone back at home holding up? miss them. its exactly 2 months and 16 days before i get on the plane and fly home!!!! mwahaha.... kk, here i come!!!!...... in another 2 months and 16 days. anyways, its time to STOP procrastinating!!! to work i go.

wasted day

was initially thinking of spending the day alone, relaxing before i get my ass moving to study for the exams. but alas, no can do. leslie and chan spent the whole day in my room rendering me from carrying out my plans. oh well, guess i'll just have to put of studying until tomorrow. anyways, i've been a bad girl today. i totally forgot about ju's birthday!!!! and i call myself a friend! sigh.. my bad, my bad. guess i was too preoccupied with last night's phone call. sigh... in any case, i got her a card and some chocs. lets hope i will be able to make it up to her tomorrow, aight?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOO JU HYUN!!!!

my tooth is aching. hurts soooo bad!!! me no know why. it happens once in a while but this time its really really bad. agh, i need a dental check up!its killing me...!!!! oh oh oh, good news!!!! i'll be going to HK during december!!! that means less time to spend at home but its ok. hope to meet the girls and kenze when i'm there. sigh.... i wonder how are things coming along at home. hope mom got her rest last night and hope that mom and dad would stop argueing about things. note to self: must remember to ask dad to exercise more the next time i call.

the ultimate sadness

mom called. had a really long talk with her. found out that my dad... well,... he's suffering from high blood pressure! all along, i thought he was fine. he eats healthy, exercises, drink lots of water, vegetarian and my mom's cooking is almost oil free. so really... why the hell would he get high blood pressure?!!!!! i cant accept it! why?! why of all people, my father!!! my heart broke when i heard the news. people with high blood pressure is a magnet of many illnesses. i've only been away for 7 months. 7 months!!! .... and so much has happened since then that i don't know about. sigh... the things that my parents put themselves through for me and my brother... my mom hasn't been sleeping for days now cuz she's worried about my dad being overly generous towards my brother and i. i know.. my dad just wants what is best for us. he's afraid that we would encounter hardships in the future. sigh... well, i really want him to know that we're both grown ups now. we can take care of ourselves. we didnt go so far away to study only to return with nothing. we know how to take care of ourselves. even if we do encounter hardships... isnt that all a part of growing up? isnt that all a part of life? well... saying is easier than doing, rite? but the thing is, he can not protect us forever. we will evetually have to come out and face the cruel reality of life. my dad... he has done so much for us.... but what have we done for him? NOTHING!!!! it's really upsetting. what i know is, now... all i can do is work hard to achieve my goals. make them proud. and when i come out to work in the future, i will take good care of them. its the only thing i can do to repay them for their kindness, for their unconditional love. sure, we've got our ups and downs. the times that i wanted to run away from home, the times that they themselves wanted to kick me out of the house... but hell, we're family. we love each other and i think that's the most important.... is that we all love each other. sigh... how i wish i could be by my parents' side in situations like these. after all, when something goes wrong, all we've got is each other.... all we've got left is family. who else is there to turn to? for all the times that they've been there for me... sigh... how i wish i could be there for them now. right this instant. i really hope my dad gets well. he's not fat... no... he doesnt eat unhealthy food all the time... but why?! high blood pressure. sigh... i'll do some extensive research about this tomorrow. i want to make sure i know every bit of detail about this... this.... high blood pressure thing. sigh... and above all, i hope my mom gets some rest. she needs it. they're getting old.... i'm scared... and worried about them. sigh... i think i'd better get to bed myself. i've got class tomorrow. pls pls pls pls pls let everything be ok..... please....

apologies, ungratefulness and nostalgia

i'm just putting off my english essay which is due in tomorrow and studying for my vocab test which is also tomorrow! >.< and CYK, you are the most ungrateful person i know. haih... oh well, like i always say, patience is a virtue!!! you should thank me man!!! not rant about how slow it is!! i think i, i mean we kinda made my dear 'ji mui' mad... sorry wor!!! didnt mean to make you angry. guess it was insensitive of us to do it, ay? our bad our bad. no hard feelings, ay? really so so sooooo sorry!!!! i promise la... i wont ever do it again la, ok??? 不要生气啦, ok?? in any case, i got my meal card. thank goodness the one i lost expired. so they've got to issue me a new one no matter what else i wont be able to get my meals. i'm happy. i wont let this one out of my sight ever again!! about 2 more weeks to the exam! sigh... really no mood to study. all i can think about now is getting home. i can already imagine myself back home, smell mommy's cooking, driving around town, meeting up with my baby and friends. oh how i miss my them. i really really canot wait till i get home!!!! getting really homesick. T_T anyways, i'd better start on my assignment. sayonara.

i made it!!!

good evening you beeeeeeeeeautiful people!!!!! guess what i got today?! guess what i got today?! got my offer letter for chiropractic!!!! mwahaha!! so happy!!! so excited!!!! weeeeeell, its just a conditional offer... so what?! i'm still happy!!!! i'm halfway there!!! just about 4 more months before i get my final offer!!! whoooo hoooo!!!! cant wait till i get into uni!! yeash!!!! life feels so good. gotta pay uni fees by nov 30th... must not forget to tell my parents about it. what goes around comes around. sigh... i lost my meal card!!!! i totally have no idea where i left it!!! i'm in deeeeeep sheeeeet. i hope i left it in someone's car while out with my aunt. so its no dinner for me tonight! of all the times they decide to check the card, its gota be today. hope i find it soon! and this is what happened to my baby's car.... poor car.... hope he gets it fixed soon.

another day

my poor baby got into an accident! thank goodness its only a minor one. his poor toyota corona is a wee bit hurt and he's pretty upset about it. my poor poor baby... *strokes YBS and his corona lovingly* oh oh oh, and he's planning on getting a house!!! whheee!!!!! gambatehne. i'll always be by your side cheering you on!!! went out for dinner again tonight. haiya... beckie getting broke!!! T_T hope mommy n daddy sends me some money soon! me no wana beg on the streets. agh, why does my aunt have to go back so soon? if not can go out eat some more mar... hor??? oh oh oh, i went to south yara to watch my classmates play. they were great!!!! and our team won!!! congratz guys!!!! you guys did great! twas a great match! keep up the good work!!! sigh... the gash on my finger is getting bigger with each passing day!!!! T_T when is it gona heal?!!! my poor little finger... dont do this to me!!! *strokes finger*

another tiring day

just got back from a movie - hellboy. it wasnt as good as i expected it to be but overall its still worth my $11.50. ah... i'm soooo bloody tired. guess you guys are sick of me complaining how tred i am, ay? cant help it though. i am tired!! remember the really bad paper cut i got? well, it seems to have gotten worse! instead of closing up, the gash is getting bigger and the wound is sooooo swollen!!! looks gross!! i really hope the gash closes up soon. dady called me today!!! weeeeeell, if you guys are confused about which dady, its ma dady in oz!!!! miss him so much! cant wait till the hols to meet him! good to know that everything is working out for him. huggiez!!!! oh, and YZW, good to know that you've finally moved on. happy to hear that you got yourself another wonderful girl! beats being with me, ay? in any case, i hope everything will work out for you this time around. i'ma hit the sack. need to wake up in the weeeeee hours of the morning to make a call to my beloved hubby. *yawn* nitey nite nite.

sit and run

went for dinner with winnie in lygon street. while walking happily down the street staring into each and every restaurant trying to make up our minds which one to go into, we ran into this waiter who kept insisting that their food was the best, if food no good no pay and he would give us free garlic bread (which i'm preeeeetty sure is free anyways), blah blah blah, burp burp burp. so yeah... why not, ay? went in and got seated, only to realize that the food costs a fortune!! T_T after a long and hard debate, we ran!!! according to CYK, people were looking at us and making comments about us running for it. haih... that was sooooo embarassing!!! malu!! >.< oh well, at least it was fun. winnie will be goin back to tassy tomorrow. anyways, hope ya enjoyed the stay. take care! miss ya!!

stupid bec

no prince charming whisking me away on his white horse for a feast. sigh... =( should've just agreed when prince charming offered to pick me up for dinner today. or at least kept my mouth shut. now its back to eating unyummy food in the hostel... i really wanted to see my aunt before she left melb. well, guess no chance now, huh?! stupid beckie!! oh well, guess you just cant have everything. at least i've got 3 nights of wonderful dinner. that will have to suffice until i return home at the end of the year. =(

2 wonderful people!!

just got back from dinner. went over to box hill for chinese and i must say... YUMMY!!! best dinner i've had so far but it was kinda expensive tho. spent $80 for 4 person!!! met 2 really nice guys today. had good food, and good company! we were just laughing our hearts out. they were so warm. sigh... though i had a great dinner, i actually don't feel so great. i feel like crying. i don't know why... just... sigh... i need someone to lean on. someone to cry on. maybe i'm just PMS-ing. i duno. or maybe its because i'm giving up something good.... i guess once you've made up your mind, you'll just have to be strong and stick with it even if something better comes your way. i dont know.... sigh.... i'll go curl up somewhere and cry my eyes out. good night.